Monday, November 5, 2007

The Gift of the Abundant Heart

I have certainly appreciated every one's thoughts on the topic of gossip. Clearly there are many particulars of the topic that deserve thought and reflection. My reflection on gossip these past few weeks has been surrounding this scripture in the New Testament:

Luke 6:45
A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil; for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.


The last part, regarding the abundance of heart, is what really got me thinking.

I am not a fan of gossip, and the best lesson I learned about gossip came when I had the privilege of meeting and becoming friends with a couple of women with whom it is impossible to gossip. They just won't take the bait. They have an amazing way of turning the conversation to something more positive or relevant without ever calling out the offender. Wow! I so want to be them when I grow up; therefore, I have been watching them carefully.

What I have learned is that they have something else to say. Something positive and edifying. That doesn't happen accidentally. In fact just the other day I heard about a study that put men and women in rooms alone for long periods of time with nothing to occupy them. Unlike most men, most women reported having spent the time recalling and reliving conversations.

What this reaffirms to me is that a major portion of our nature is this heavy importance on relationships. That is not all bad, but it is not all good either, and I think we need to channel that tendency in a positive direction. That is the process of the abundance of the heart on which I have been reflecting.

Sometimes our lives as women becomes relatively small, and I don't mean that in sense of importance. Mothering, in my book, is the most important job in the world. I mean small in the sense that we spend a lot of time at home, doing a lot of mundane chores, surrounded by a lot of little people who, as much as we love them, aren't intellectually stimulating yet. We see the same people, do the same things; am I the only one who has experienced cabin fever? Or am I the only one to find myself living in a deep, deep rut?

Perhaps it is that routine that makes it so easy for gossip to slip into our dialogue. What else do we have to say? Where is the abundance of our heart?

If nothing else, this scripture encourages me to fill my heart with edifying and intellectually stimulating thoughts and information, and then when I converse I have something relevant and thought-provoking to share.

I have found that it can be done relatively easily. Even when our lives don't give us a lot of alone time, we can find a few moments here and there: A good magazine in the bathroom--no joke; it may be the only quiet moments I enjoy all day. A podcast to listen to as I clean. Reading the paper over breakfast. Scripture study before bed. Joining a book club. These few activities give me something to think about during my day besides "She said what?" and "Who did that?"

They help me lift my head out of the mundane and see something with a bigger purpose or higher meaning. Hopefully, it is filling my heart with a positive abundance, and I am becoming convinced that an abundant heart may be the best gift we can give our family, our friends, and our little corner of the world.

12 comments:

1blueshi1 said...

that is so sweet--I love those thoughts. and I don't mean sweet in a trivializing kind of way, I mean, true sweetness COMING from an abundance of the heart. definitely thoughts to ponder. thanks for discussing this issue, I think I get a little bogged down in the whole working mom thing and it is hard to raise my head from my rut and consider some deeper things and ways to improve myself spiritually (ok, stop laughing, anyone who knows me. I could improve spiritually!)

Amber said...

I love this, all of it. Thanks for the inspiration and envoking a re-newed desire!

Madame Queen said...

I think we all get in that rut. And sometimes gossip is a way to add "excitement." Having been the victim of very hurtful gossip in my life, I do try to stay away from it.

But I definitely like the idea of challenging myself to stay above that stuff. Thanks for the thought provoking post.

Kate said...

awesome, friend! I love it... I want to be the person that someone comes to and knows I would never gossip... I need to come a long way to get there... but I hope to really be that way- aren't the scriptures awesome???

LaughAtMe-Laurel said...

Well put. Filling my mind & heart with more intellectual and stimulating matters has been something I've been trying to challenge myself to do...but it hasn't been working! Maybe if I accept the challenge from you I'll do better!

"The Queen in Residence" said...

Laurel- I do not know you personally but my sis-in-law has your link on her site. Any hoo, what you said was really great. We are too caught up in the gossip, making others look foolish to make ourselfs look and feel better when we really need to just love and accept. I too have dealt with gossip and wondered why we have such a thing, but I too have decided that it is best to take the high road and once you do that it is amazing how many similar people come into your life. I am surroundded by others that say kind things, that know that I will not share a confidence because it is not my news to share. Thank you for posting such a thought provoking question, and keep the bloggs coming.

"The Queen in Residence" said...

I am in Utah and so far away from the bugs, or at least the crawly, big, can really hurt when they get you things. But we did have a mouse once and that is enough to give you the creeps for the longest time. I think that for about a month after that I was constantly cleaning things and never took off my shoes. It was so unnerving.

So I have intregued you, there really is no mystery, my Sis-in-law is Laurel Shiner and just so happens to have your same name and so that is why I think that she has your link on her Blog, "Little Miss Sassy Pants". So check her out cause she thinks that your story about the poop was the bomb and so did I!!!

Keep Blogging and I will be checking to see what fun your family has in store for tomorrow.

Thanks for the kudos about my nursing degree, I am still doing pre-req's but I have been waiting for my little guy to get into Kindergarten so I can have the time for school. Everything in it's season. Now is the season for me to expand the brain, too bad I am so old, things stop functioning after 35.

Rochelleht said...

Your post on gossip had my friend, Katri and I talking for days. I LOVED it! It is something that I struggle with. I'm one of those who would never say something in front of a group of people, but think somehow saying it to one close friend is ok. You know what I mean...

Such a thought-provoking post. I so agree that we need to fill our lives with goodness. I try so hard, but you are right, sometimes the mundane can creep in and knock us off course.

Thanks for your great words. I am certainly feeling the push to be better. You rock!!!

Melissa said...

Great post as always Laurel. I am truly a better person because I know you. I am so lucky.

Lisa-Marie said...

THANK YOU!

Amanda said...

Great post! You can't see me but I'm applauding you.

*clap*clap*clap*

I was a victim of gossip years ago and since then, I always think - if one is able to think of negative things to say about someone else, they must not have enough positive to say about themselves.

Lauren said...

I love this post. I feel really inspired to avoid gossip..which is one of my weaknesses unfortunately. And so bad!! However I think youre right about gossip stemming from the feeling that you have nothing else to talk about besides other people..Ive often turned to gossip as a last resort in a lagging conversation...