Let me explain my point of view for just a moment. Among other things, I believe:
1. We are all children of a loving Father in Heaven.
2. As his children we are endowed with qualities of the divine. Truly there is a light in each of us.
3. We have been given the gift of agency to do with that light what we will.
4. We have been given the opportunity in this life to become the best versions of ourselves if we choose to do so.
I'm not asking for agreement here. It is simply a statement about my ultimate motivation. I do not see life as a competition with anyone else; the only person I am competing with is me: Whether or not I can master myself. Whether or not I fulfill my potential.
Perhaps that is why I have long loved this quote. I don't know when or where I first encountered it, but what I do remember of the experience is thinking, "Wow. I wish I had written that." It seemed so perfectly to express the driving belief of my own life:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” --From Marianne Williamson's book Return to Love (often wrongly attributed to Nelson Mandela)
In moments when I find myself out of my comfort zone and am fearful of the judgement of others, I repeat parts of this statement in my head. (Now you'll know what I'm thinking before standing up in front of a group of people.)
But I have found myself rethinking this quote over the last couple of days. See, it's not entirely true. Or, rather, maybe I'm understanding it better. The problem lies in the last two lines (my favorites by the way.) It says: "And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
The difficulty comes with the word "others." Notice it doesn't say "everyone." What I'm figuring out is that there are some people that aren't liberated by another's light. In fact, they're bugged by it. I don't know. Maybe it gets in the eyes or shines through their bedroom window at night, but for whatever reason they just find it irritating.
Help me out, and share your thoughts, 'cause I'm still trying to figure it out. What gives with these people?
Thursday, September 11, 2008
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15 comments:
Hi, I am Bill's wife's sister. I really enjoy your blog. You are a talented writer. What an interesting question you have posed. I also really like that quote. Are you asking if sometimes when you are letting your light shine, you are actually showing off? Or sometimes we should hold back and let someone else take center stage? I am really interested to know what happened in your life that got you thinking about this. I started thinking about a lady in our old ward who always played her flute anytime the choir sang and at every stake conference. I often thought, "Isn't there anyone else in the stake with musical talent?" It probably wasn't her fault, they probably just counted on her to be willing to play. I look forward to you posting more on this topic.
A few months ago I did "too good of a job" throwing a baby shower and was asked when I was going to overcome my disease of perfectionism as a result. The comments were driven by envy, but still pierced my heart.
I'm learning that we should not only avoid casting judgment on those who are making unholy choices, but that we should also refrain from developing opinions on how others choose to use their time or what talents they pursue.
Too much beer.
I had that same quote hanging up in my apartment when I was single and again during my first few years of marriage. I had copied it from someone else (wrongly attributed to Nelson Mandella). I absolutely love that. I've always wondered why so many would rather observe instead of getting into the fray when I know that their talents and abilities exceed that of those who are involved. I love that you get people to think about stuff, really think!!!
So true. I think there is a fair amount of 'jealousy' out there. I think sometimes those who aren't happy don't want anyone else to be happy as well. They don't enjoy watching others succeed.
I like the light you give off. I can hang with ya!
I agree with Heather....
I find myself going down the same road. Unsually when there is a life change I start to question things. Why I do what I do. Am I doing to best I can do. Do I have to do the best? Why do I care so much about some things and not so much about others?
Ok I read this too late in the day. Now my mind is spinning.
I have a soccer party tomorow....Why I do to much?
I'm calling you next week!!! Cuz I miss you.
Give us context on the exact circumstance surrounding your realization that some people have a problem with others who are embracing Mandela's thought. My initial reaction is that some people are jealous, insecure, competitive, OR sensitive to the fact that there may be other people in the room who would shine if the "loudest" person in the room wasn't so "loud" and demanding all of the attention. . .or the flute player who always plays instead of giving someone else a chance. These issues are way too complicated to analyze when you are prego and hormonal-- wait another year and try really hard not to get offended for at least 2 years--- the hormones are RAGING girl!
I think everyone has pretty much hit the nail on the head -- I believe that those types of thoughts/words/actions from other people are usually due to some kind of insecurity about themselves. Your success makes them feel bad about themselves and they want to tear you down just a little, to bring you back down to their level. It's hurtful, though, isn't it?
We all have some insecurities and some attack to build back up. I think that's what the liberal media is doing to Palin.
Do I have a one-track mind??? :-)
I think it depends upon what the source of the "light" is. If it is pure, then it will surely encourage others to shine in a most authentic way. If it is not from a pure motivation, or if it is not from God, then it will be like shining a flood lamp over someone else's spotlight. I think the author is talking about a "fire in your heart" kind of light moving from one of us to the other, each of us igniting the heart of the next person in turn.
I agree with jennifer..wells said :)
Whoops..well said, I mean :)
Oh so true. I've been feeling this a lot in my own life lately.
I had a friend try to explain it to me in her perspective once. She said that she felt like there were only so many "good things" that happen and if it happened to someone else then it wouldn't happen to her. It's something that she struggles with and is working on it. I just wish everyone could be like bloggers – embracing and encouraging.
Hi. We don't know each other, I am just doing some "blog-hopping" tonight and came across yours. Hope you don't mind. I wonder if some people haven't realized their own shining moments. They have had them, but they're sort of blind to them. Does that make sense? When we don't feel like we are good at things, it is easier to be negative about others than it is to really search our own selves. Sort of like choosing to see the blessings in our lives or the tender mercies that have been given to us.
Sorry to go on and on...I really love your blog. Have a great day!
Still thinking about this topic. I was reading old Segullah blog posts and came across one that reminded me of your posts http://segullah.org/small-epiphanies/all-theyve-got-part-i-my-name-is-dalene-and-im-a/ I am not sure if that link is going to turn up in the comments, but if it does, go check it out.
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