The Tea PartyPlace

Author's note post publish:  I pushed the publish button at 1:07 am last night.  I wasn't sure I wanted to.  I wasn't sure I had really gotten to the heart of the matter.  What I wanted to do was publish pictures of Logan's birthday party, but when you say part 1 of a 3 part essay, you kind of feel pressured to supply part two.

And when I awoke this morning--or rather, was awoken this morning--it was, if not the first thing I thought about, then the second.  The thing is, I'm not really clear in my own brain about it all.  There is a basic dogma here that I'm not buying, but how to articulate it, I'm not sure.

What I know:  1) Elizabeth Gilbert and I disagree on some core values.  And that is okay.  She has a complete right to her opinion.  2) There is a difference between micro and macro.  Meaning, what she does in her personal life is her personal business, and I should have no say in that.  But when she affects the cultural attitude, I can and should have an opinion about that.  We should think a second time before we give everything a live and let live stamp.

It reminds me of a time when I watched Hallie Barry on Oprah.  She was saying how she would never marry again because, she didn't "need a man to complete her."  I don't take issue with her words necessarily.  She'd been through a bad divorce.  I get her bias.  But what struck me like a thunderbolt was the audience's response.  Everyone burst into applause.  It was a real women's power moment.  And I thought, "Do we all feel this way?  Are we all supposed to be convinced that marriage is a bad thing?"

I don't think that marriage and children stand in the way of a women's fulfillment.  I don't want our culture to buy into that.  I think that would breed a lot of unhappy women.  And so I pushed the publish button.  Ready or not. 

Feel free to weigh in, but be gentle.  I was up late last night. :0)